I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
