allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
