he told me I talked like a deaf person
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
