She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
