How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Dear god my vagina.
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