There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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