So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
