I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
