Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
it's like iHOP with fire
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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