Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
