Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
