awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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