the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
