How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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