I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
how drunk are you?
Several
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
