Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
You were trust falling into bushes
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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