Non-Jews are for practice
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
