I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
