How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
sex in a hospital.. check
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
