I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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