she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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