Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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