Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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