yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
