dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
All the doctor said was why
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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