Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
