So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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