this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
