But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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