hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Randomize
