U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
