If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
