Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
