guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
