perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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