i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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