I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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