Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
