Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize