Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
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