Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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