Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
