bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize