Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
