butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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