At least make sure they are 18
Why
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
