I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
