remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Randomize
