yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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