I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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